Self-love is regard for one’s happiness and growth in terms of spiritually, physically, and mentally. So, it is essential for us to recognize ourselves, nurture our well-being, and incite ourselves to inspire others.
Let me share some of the best advice I got from my family and friends that has helped me understand myself and perform self-love.
The Seven Amazing Self-Love Advices
#1. Give a Hug
Allow yourself to be affectionate to others. Self-love means letting yourself find happiness in the happiness of others. Small things count, like giving a hug! At first, I was afraid to show affection to others. I thought it is clingy and inappropriate because it is like crossing boundaries. But I realized that as long as you know your grounds and limits, then it is okay.
Show some love to your family and friends! It is a sign of respect too! Give thanks by hugging. Why not say your goodbyes by hugging? Or express your hellos by embracing. It is self-rewarding, and it helps remove your and others’ anxiety.
#2. Know your Limits
I love coffee! I can drink four cups or more a day. However, because I found out that I have a hormonal imbalance, I controlled my coffee intake. Too much coffee isn’t good for my health hence I have to control it.
I found out as well that I’m not too fond of too much noise. It makes me irritable. So, to protect me from being moody and short-tempered, I don’t go to clubs with too much noise. Instead, I’d rather choose a café that has soothing music in the background.
Know your limits means better understand yourself. It can be physical, mental, or spiritual. If you know your limits, it is easy for you to control yourself in whatever aspects.
#3. Have Faith
You don’t need to be religious because faith is absolute trust in God instead of religion. Faith is something unexplainable that you and the Supreme Being only knows.
Looking back, I never thought that I would become what I am today. I was a thin, shy, poor girl who grew up in a small rural area. I used to go to school without breakfast and snacks. I was walking 2km from our house to school with the eagerness of learning and graduating. At some point, I experienced being mocked and treated differently among others. It was painful, but because of faith, I stood tall.
Faith taught me to love and believe in myself. Faith introduced me to hope. Faith showed me how to be courageous. Faith guided me on how to respect and forgive myself. And most importantly, faith has encouraged me to be better than myself every day, not for myself alone but the people surrounding me.
#4. Learn to Wait
Patience is a virtue! Do not rush yourself. Learn to wait. Don’t compare yourself to others. Every man has his own time, his own turn. Be patient in waiting for your turn. Instead, work smart and hard in attaining your goals while patiently waiting.
I was so upset because I was not able to enroll in college for the second time. I had to stop due to financial issues. I thought I would not be able to finish my studies and earn my degree. Time has passed. I made my degree and was able to march obtaining my university diploma! I didn’t care if it took me a long time to complete my university diploma. What matters is I completed my studies, facing all challenges that came up in my way!
You will be able to. When it’s your time, then it’s your time! So, wait for your turn while focusing on your growth.
Always be active. You don’t need to go to the gym every day! Well, if you do go to the gym to do your exercises, keep it up! If not, at least do a 15-20 minutes walk every day. Go out to your neighborhood and walk. It’s also a chance for you to meet a new acquaintance and connect with your neighbors.
I got to be honest, and this is also a struggle for me. So, what I usually do is basic yoga and stretching. I also do breathing exercises. Exercising together with a balanced diet will help you keep a better immune system, keep yourself fit, and keep better mental health too!
#6. Be a Hero
There’s a saying that ‘True hero does not wear cape.’ Absolutely correct! Because you can be a hero by making a simple gesture to others, animals, and plants!
Help an older adult crossing the road. Help your mother keeping the house clean. Buy a less fortunate person a meal or snacks. Don’t hit a stray dog or cat. Don’t shoot a bird. Throw your litter in the trash bin. Water the plants. Huge difference comes from small things.
One of my new year’s resolutions this year 2020 is to use reusable or eco-bag when shopping. A woman said to the bagger, “Oh! I want that orange bag too! Why did you just put mine in the brown bag?” The bagger replied, “Ma’am, it’s hers (pointing at me).” “Oh, okay” “Let’s keep an eco-bag next time,” the woman then told her daughter! My inner soul was jumping happily, tapping my shoulder! Oh, that was awesome!
#7. Forgive and Forget
Like I said in my previous post about forgiveness, it is a complex process. But forgiveness is vital to your wholeness as a person. Forgiving yourself and others is essential for your mental health and well-being. You are human. You will commit errors despite striving to be perfect. At some point in your life, you will fall because of a wrong decision. By this time, forgiving yourself and forgetting the mistakes and pain will help you stand up and be a better person.
In my university days, I had a ‘terror accounting professor.’ Thus, I always see that I will complete my assignments and study before entering her class. One day, I was so caught up with my schedule that I worked full time, 8 hours a day during the morning, and went to school right after work. I did my best to understand and complete my assignment, but there’s one accounting problem in which I had difficulty. I was so lucky that day, and I was asked to solve that item in front of the class.
I managed to give the correct answer, but I am unable to explain it. I am so confused with the formula and its why and how’s. The ‘terror accounting professor’ scolded me in front of the class. I felt embarrassed! I was angry with myself! I was mad at my professor.
Time passed, and realization occurs! I thanked that professor and myself for that experience. Because of that experience, I realized that I don’t want to be an accountant. I don’t want to see myself locked in a four-cornered room, counting monies that aren’t mine and looking for the missing cents. That experience has pushed me to evaluate myself and cross-checked what I want to do in the future! Hence, I have changed my degree from BSBA Financial Accounting to BSBA Management which I have complete.
Self-love is not a selfish thing. Self-love is learning to develop yourself while attaining your true happiness. Remember these seven simple pieces of advises:
- Give a Hug
- Know your Limits
- Have Faith
- Learn to Wait
- Be a Hero
- Forgive and Forget
What’s your idea about self-love? What advice can you give to do self-love? I love to hear from you!
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